Thursday, November 5, 2009

The Art of Saying No

An interesting thing just happened.  Earlier I spoke with a friend on the phone.  Her life is extremely busy at the moment and things are quite overwhelming for her.  She is taking some steps to change this and she told me that one of the steps is to say no to things; events, requests etc that she doesn't get an immediate positive feeling or positive 'gut reaction' from.  I likened this to actually listening to her intuition.
When I had finished the call, I wanted to start my latest blog post and was looking for inspiration for the post in that new book I wrote about previously called "1001 Ways to Live in the Moment"by Barbara Ann Kipfer.  I thought I would write about whatever page I opened up at.  Low and behold if the page I opened up on wasn't about the art of saying no!
What Barbara says about the art of saying no is that there are two sides of living in the now.  One is to look for and take the best opportunities that come your way.  The other is to say no to anything that comes your way that works against what you stand for or goes against your values or gives you that negative 'gut reaction'. 
Something I have been working on with my clients is setting yourself some personal policies around trusting this feeling and living in the now so you can actually notice what this gut reaction is and then make a decision.  
We talk about manifesting the life we want.  Quite often we are living too much in the past or the future to be able to see the opportunities happening for us now that will help us manifest what we want in our lives.  Example:  You are stressed  and constantly worrying about what you haven't achieved.  You are sick of being stressed but don't know how to change it.  The kids(insert partner, family, friends here) are always nagging you to go and have some fun with them.  Can't they see you are really stressed and busy.......
If you just stopped all the thoughts running through your mind and lived in the present, you would see the opportunity to change your life to what you want (more fun) is right there in front of you.  What's stopping you now?  If it's just a matter of taking that first step, find someone who can help you and motivate you to take that first step.  The steps after the first one will become easier and you will have fun!  Trust me!


  1. It's so amazing that when you're focussed on something you attract lessons accordingly. You're doing a great job. I'm adding your blog to my blog list so I can read your posts as they are written ... you might even get more visitors.